patrick

11:00 am: long time no update
for those of you who still use livejournal (ive sorta started using the myspace blog more...) i just thought id let you all know that as of nov. 9th, im going to be in florida. im not sure for how long just yet, it's sort of a fly by night thing. maybe ill just wait out the winter months, who knows. but if you need me my cell phone will remain the same. hope all is well with everyone in livejournal-land.

01:06 pm: fade away never
so i just watched velvet goldmine the other day with stacey.

i now want to be a glamrock star.

oh i also want to hump around with jonathan rhys-meyers and christian bale. (ive always wanted to hump around with christian bale i suppose.)

i think the most random fact about the film is that thom yorke does a few of the vocals in it. i guess it makes sense though cuz michael stipe produced it and they are all chummy chum. but it really didnt sound like thom yorke when i first heard it. it took rewinding it and really listening to hear similarities. it sure is him though-- he just sings in a really low octave. he still shapes his words the same and the vibrato is dead on. scaaaaaaaaary though.

oh and i got so moist over the glam-tabulous soundtrack i went out and bought it the next day.

i am a consumer whore.

01:14 pm: oh my
theres nothing quite like waking up in bed and not remembering how you got there.

finding and empty flask of southern comfort near my bedroom door helped explain a little.

my mother surely thinks im a drunk after watching me drink gin on the rocks last night.

oh.

and charro (the spanish goddess of guitar and all around ridculousness) is playing in SF.




i should just pull the lever on the toilet bowl that is my life.

03:36 pm: bologna
so ive started to enjoy eating this nasty substance once more. just on some plain white bread, with a little yellow mustard, and two slices of tasty bologna. mmm mmm good.

oscar mayer has a way with B-O-L-O-G-N-A...

06:08 pm: yikes
so the neighbor boy was arrested today. apparantly he's been dealing most of springfields heroin. he had been caught once, but was released for some crazy reason. my brother (who always seems to have insides on springfield drug traffic...) told me that he took his stash and placed it at his grandparents house (my neighbor) because "no one suspects gma/pa"! well apparantly the kid was fingered and was hauled away today around 5pm. it was done quickly, with little show. no sirens. no dogs. just two cop cars and a paddy waggon. im sure the neighbors all have their panties in a wad trying to figure out whats going on. thanks to my brother, i am the enlightened neighbor! all shall worship me to gain knowledge!!!!!

01:43 pm: oh yea
michael called me last night. hes in NY for work. such a silly boy-- he got stoned while walking down 45th street and decided to call me. how sweet. i was getting ready for bed and was wanting someone to cuddle with. i must go visit SF first chance i get.

01:31 pm: warning: sick entry ahead
i ate some really fuckin spicy thai food last night. i thought drinking whiskey last night would help, but i feel it made it much much worse. my ass feels as if someone lit a firecracker and shoved it in my rectum. even the imodium isnt helping!!!!!! i think im going to sit in the bath tub. maybe that will help. if not, im definitely drinking more whiskey, at least it will numb the burning!!!

02:17 pm: san francisco
its like god is taunting me.

it seems as if everyone i know is in the bay area currently. my friend mary, betsy, lindsay, and robert all went for vacation. they'll be there for two weeks. my uncle/aunt and cousins are there for a week, AND a few friends from NY are visiting for a few days. such a bad time to be poor -- i could be living it up with all my friends in a lovely part of the world :(


soon.

10:10 am: gin
so i went out last night.

kristen decided i could drink for free as long as i tried the tanq. 10 (ive never tried it... im a fan of sapphire) so fine, free gin, i didnt care. well, she didnt put any tonic in it. all night, i drank gin on the rocks. now i hurt all over. and there are large spaces of time i dont remember. i think i called a friend of mine in NY and told him i wanted to have his children, but i looked at my call log this AM and i think i might have called my uncle. oops.

so no more gin on the rocks for paddy for a while.

03:34 pm: randomness
so....

my friend max called today to update me on fun stuff happening in his life. hes doing well-- he and his bf chad are still rockin on. and max is still working at apple. god bless him lol.

max, being the Tivo whore he is, stumbled upon some show on FXChannel called "30 days". apparantly one of the episodes involves this 24yo midwestern conservative who is NOT gay friendly at all. he is forced to move into an apartment with a guy in san francisco named ed. ed, being a very out n' proud memeber of SF gay life, takes the kid on a biggaytour of SF. sounds like a doozie eh?

well, max watched it and he said there was something really familiar about this guy ed. his voice, his looks, and personality. i got online and watched a promo clip of the show and i about shit my pants. turns out, i sorta dated this guy ed on/off. i dont even know if dating is the right word...but we had some good times. (i wrote an entry around thanksgiving 2yrs ago that involved a motorcycle ride around SF... that was ed.) but, we ended up going our seperate ways. ive not spoken to him in almost a year. (he emailed me like a month after i moved home, but thats the last i heard of him.)

to make this an even more random event, the conservative 24yo is also forced to get a job... in the castro... at AG Ferrari, the import shop i used to work at! WTF? why couldnt this have happend like a year ago? lol. ah well.

cheers to ed. i hope you got a piece of that 24yo, hes kind of a brute, but cute.

01:50 pm: plato's closet.
what a stupid name for a consignment shoppe.

so i was cleaning out my closet today, found a bunch of sweaters that i don't want anymore and some pants that just dont fit (theyre actually too SMALL if you can believe it!) and i decided to sell them to this afformentioned "platos closet." they unfortunately had other ideas about the clothes i had to sell. i had a couple sweaters from the gap, a nice ralph lauren wool sweater, some old navy shirts ive never worn, a pair of pants from nicole farhi, two jackets, and some kenneth cole shirts (with tags still on them!) --- all of it refused. REFUSED! i was told that all of these products were "too mature" becuase the store is geared towards YOUNG ADULTS!!! IM THE GODDAMN POSTERCHILD FOR YOUNG ADULTHOOD! i was basically told by some bitchy 14yo girl who was wearing last season abercrombie/fitch that didnt even fit her well that my clothes weren't hip enough.

fuck that stupid cunt. im going to take all those clothes to the goodwill. if anyone wants a pair of nicole farhi pants from her fall of 01 collection or some other stylish digs for a HELLUVA discount, check out the goodwill on macarthur. theyll be there this afternoon.

this is a rural hell. someone pass a knife, im ready to die!

Tags: stupidcuntbagwhorepieceofshitbreederbitc

02:48 pm: brecht
And I always thought that the simplest words
Must be enough. That when I say how things are
Everyone's heart must be torn to shreds.
That you'll go down if you don't stand up.
Surely you see that.

02:35 pm: my car...
...is not fixed.

the people had no clue what was wrong with it.

they tested the battery- fully charged. looked at the alternator- works perfectly. checked for a short in any electrical lines- none to be found.

so what the fuck is draining my battery of juice?! why is it that every 3 days or so, the battery gets drained down to like 3volts?! aaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrgh.

im trying to convince mother to buy the BMW thats for sale across the street. its slightly used, but for 17,000 bucks, its a steal really!! right. anyway, ill prolly be carless for a while (again!) so i guess now i HAVE to be a homebody, like it or not.

03:57 pm: gertrude stein
so i got a little high earlier and was flipping through 'tender buttons' and i came across this bit that really like...

"Dance a clean dream and an extravagant turn up, secure the steady rights and translate more than translate the authority, show the choice and make no more mistakes than yesterday."






god, thank god for pot thank god for high thank god for god thank god for stein thank god for words thank god thank god.

08:59 pm: pride
so it was merely an "ok" weekend. i got to bloomington late thursday night and basically went to bed. friday i went job hunting. emilie thinks itd be a good idea for me to move to BN. after looking for jobs there and seeing what bloomington has to offer me, i have to disagree. no one is hiring and the town is more 'rink-a-dink' than springfield. oh, katie came to visit friday night. that was exciting because she leaves for salzburg soon to sing away the remainder of the summer. *sigh* what a life.

saturday emilie and i left for chicago. was a pretty quick drive from B/N, though i suppose we only had to go as far as tinley park. we met up with some of her friends from college and attended a housewarming party alison was throwing. alison was this funny girl with these religious parents-- i think i offended them when i screamed "holy fuck" at something someone said. i love the word fuck, i think others should embrace it like i have. just say it and tell me you dont feel naughty in a good way!? we ended up spending the night there. i was slightly bumed though because multiple people were calling me to get me to come into the city... jarod and joe mainly. jarod even tried to convince me to take a cab (like a $50 ride from where i was at... if not more!) it would have been fun though-- he knows the owner of sidetracks and was scoring free booze and whatnot. oh jarod. next time.

the parade was so/so. i recall SF's having a political aspect to it (like the mayor's float and state reps and what not..) but the best part of the parade is when the falcon studios and titan media floats cruise on by and you see your favorite porn stars humping the air and each other... none of that here in the midwest. gov. blagoiavich walked the route and there were a lot of "get tested for syphillis" floats. (yes syphillis is on the rise in chicago, but come on...that float is such a party killer!!)

jarod ended up meeting me halfway through the parade. i was pretty tipsy by then; drinking a bottle of champagne in 95 degree heat really gets to ya after a while. jarod needed beer, so we crossed the parade route to obtain the life giving substance. they wouldnt allow him in without his shirt, so I had to purchase...lucky for me there was a cute guy by the name of justin checking me out the whole time!! woohoo. he flirted with me a bit and then i sorta lost him in the crowd :( so sad. but i must give jarod some major kudos for making my pride sunday much more fun than the group i was with... the crowd i came with did nothing but complain about the heat and bicker about some girl that couldnt figure out how to use the CTA... booooooooring.

to top off my mediocre weekend, i get in my car that was parked in bloomington all weekend, turn the key and BAM, nothing happens. the battery is dead. this has occured quite a few times over the past few weeks. apparantly theres a fuse thats busted and it makes the lights come on even when the cars not started. great. so i left the car in B/N til today when my dad could drive up and help get it running again. the car is safe in my driveway now.

















*oh and just so people know... YES i am skinny. ive always been skinny. ill most likely always be skinny. it IS something im insecure about. bringing it up as a topic of conversation for an entire weekend in front of other people (some of whom i dont even know) is NOT a way to get on my good side. i put up with enough these comments quite a bit over the past 4 days, but that does not mean that i didnt find them akward, immature, and rather rude. if you think im so skinny, buy me a steak dinner or get me a year long membership to golds. both are gladly accepted. thank you.

08:01 pm: randy randomson...
so emilie called me just a bit ago to ask if i wanted to go to chicago with her. of course i would! but im broke right? well according to her, theres some hot guy (dan?) who wants to meet me there and her friend maureen (?) is going to host us for the weekend, making the whole trip cost next to nothing! woot. plus its pride weekend... so we're gonna go to the parade and all that.

just pray to jesus that the red bitch makes it to bloomington tonight. oh and thank you emilie for making my weekend rule!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

11:41 am: st. louis
well, ive been in STL for the past week and a half basically. just been lounging about my friend steves place and helping him get it in order to sell. personally i think he should keep the house and let me rent a room hehe. but he feels the need to move to columbus, OH. he has introduced me to some real interesting people... drew, all of the johns lol, angela, and tj... and always has some interesting story to tell me (like how he met some guy, messed around with him-- only to find out later that he was in a bunch of hothouse pornos!) such a crazy man! he's supposed to be moving at the end of month, assuming the house is bid on and whatnot. sadly, i think this might have been my last trip down to visit steve. my next visit might be to Ohio, which is unfortunately a 9hr drive east. (i could look at it this way... its the halfway point if i were to drive to NYC...hrm....) i guess best of luck to steve and hope he doesnt forget his friends here at home. :)

11:21 am: headache
so emilie called me last night, only to tell me that "all of the men attending the rehersal dinner will be wearing khakis."

hooray.

her call was on behalf of her mother. i think their stress levels are hitting all time highs-- who calls to tell someone that everyone is wearing khaki unless you want that person to wear khaki TOO!? i hapen to be wearing a khaki linen to the actual wedding. i couldnt possibly wear the same thing this evening. that would be fashion suicide! i have an image to uphold, what after being in ABE magazine and all! (HA!) supposedly, they only wanted to inform me of the khaki 'situation' so i wouldnt feel left out!

i think im going to wear my paper denim anyway.




let the champagne flow.

11:53 am: well some updates are in order i think.

ill start with the most important--

1) i was "let go" from my job. im slightly upset that after a year of working my ass off for cafe brio, they can turn around and say "you fucked up once, youre outta here, oh yea, thanks for not caring about your job..." dumbasses. its not the worst thing in the world-- everyone misses me and keeps telling me work isn't as much fun without me.

2) my brother is a dipshit. so he got a DUI on his 18th b-day (this was almost 2yrs ago) and he has to do so many hours of personal improvement at a place called triangle-center. (sounds gay no?) hes yet to attend one of the meetings and now the sangamon county courts are telling him hes going to head to jail for a year if he dosent start going. does it make me white trash if my bro is in jail?

3) i go to STL a lot. i dont get it, ive been unemployed for like a month and ive traveled more now then when i had a job. i meet this cool guy, steve, in STL. he plays piano for churches and the gay mens chorus there. he also works construction. (i find the last part to be kinda hot!) anyway, he's always excited to have me come down and hang out. its not really a 'date' thing, just two friends, but its an awful lot of fun--he introduced me to this HOT guy named andrew that i got to make out with (YES!). i was especially impressed when i found out he was only 20yo...by the way he carried himself and based upon his build, i could have sworn he was at least my age or older.

4) since ive been unemployed, i dont drink as much. i dont know if this is a good thing or a bad thing. im sure its only a temporary thing though-- wait til the $$$ starts rolling in once more, and then ill be popping bottles of moet and cliquot yet again.

5) i called my father the other day to ask a small favor and when he picked up his cellphone i heard, "im busy...*click*..." im sorry, but you dont do that to people, least of all your son. rude fucker. i called him back and basically did the same thing but said "youre a rude fuck" and hung up. (i know, mature, right?) somehow the next night i was treated to a steak dinner... go figure.

6) a note on that steak dinner previously mentioned... it was a prime-rib, med. rare, 18oz, juicy and tender as all hell. ive had 3 dreams about it since. i NEED another. god that was good beef. the odd part about this story is that the steak-of-my-dreams came from a Longhorn steakhouse. a chain restaurant people!!! i was slightly disgusted with myself, but fuck, the cut of meat was flawless, the perfect amount of fat to seal in juice and slow cooked for proper tenderness.... OMG GIVE ME ANOTHER FUCKING PRIME RIB NOW!

7) im going to a wedding on saturday. its a friend's brothers marriage. it should be fun, this friend (emilie) has known me since kindergarten and we get along quite well. oh, theres an open bar at the reception. score.

8) mary, betsy, and myself had our dream come true (i think?) by getting pictures of our drunk asses printed in ABE magazing (aka the joke of the century!). ABE mag = this piss poor attempt by a few springfieldians; i suppose you could call them the self-declaired 'glitteratti' of central illinois, to make themselves look much more important then they really are. so ABE mag. threw a spring 'fasion show' back in feb. and mary, betsy, and moi were invited. we almost declined until we found out the party was sponsered by absolute. sponsered my ass, i swear to god the dude in charge went to sam's club and bought cases of vodka. just because you give away free absolute vodka DOSENT MEAN the company SPONSERED THE EVENT! either way, the drinks were free and plentiful. mary got hit on by some hot personal trainer guy. she blew him off, mostly because i think she was ready to vomit from the booze. it was a hoot to say the least-- imagine mary and myself making fun of damn near everything from the "makeup-by-chanel" (uh huh.... more like chanel makeup applied by the lady from bergners) to that 'serendipidy' faggot i hate. (wearing a striped shirt and black pants of course.) oh and of course theres betsy, complaining the drinks are too weak, then wandering upstairs to the restaurant bar and ordering a double ketel/tonic to kick her back into gear. shes a dainty flower. maybe these pictures mean we're somebody TOO!



thats pretty much all thats happend lately. ill keep you posted on more, though since im kinda broke i dont do much lately. oh and to all of you that think im being an asshole for not going out these days, sorry. 'party-patrick' will return when he gets a job. this is all i have to say.

07:23 pm: oh lord. so im in st. louis. ive had one of the MOST craziest times... update later.